Poylar PNanchali

Rajarshi Guha Roy

Scene 1. AaNt-e (l) ghaa deben na ekdom !

 

“Phone ta rakho Pritam! Shobshomoy facebook e foshti-noshti korata tomar kaal hobe ekdin.” – hunkar chharlen Vulture Babu. Bhodroloker porone otyonto shochoniyo bhabe moyla ekti fotua, jeta bodhoy Bapu nijer hathe Sabarmati Ashram e bunechhilen. Onar naam ta ashole Culture Bandopadhyay, parar noshto chhele-chhokra ra ekdin onake onar ghore ‘Nil Bidroho’ chola kalin dekhe fele,  tarpor orai naam ta paalte diechhe.

“ei shoptaher Anandashongbad ta porechho? Desher ki obosthya? Shobai gate khola dekhlei lathi-shota nie dhuke jachhe!”  “haan ta oboshyo thhik-i..”, “R janoto,” – ekbar katha shuru korle holo. Toothpaste er moto hoe jaan Vulture Babu. Shudhu berote thake. “ekta notun weapon design korechhe ora – naam ta obhinobo – ‘khisti’. Jar opor raag hobe, tar opor ei ostro ta chalie dao. Seo Jodi ulte oi ostro I tomar upor proyog kore, tahole to aro bhalo. Tomar I gyaan er shomriddhi hobe.”

“sotti, ja bolechhen, r para jachhe na.” “Tai to bolchhi, eishob foshti-noshti na kore desher kaaj koro. Shomajchetonay nijeke udbuddho koro. Bhalo bus er daabite ‘March’ e gechhile tumi?” “Nah, shomoy hoe othheni.” Khorgohosto Vulture Babu gorjon kore uthhlen, “Ta keno hobe? Hotobhaga kothakar! Din e Saira Banu, r rate ekla ghore ***u – ei nie i achho! Markini moshla ja bête dichhe, gile gile khachho.”

Bolte bolte Janlar opor bosha kak ta k tarie ektu thamlen Vulture Babu. Mone holo, tarie tarie kichhu dekhechhen tini. “Pasher parar latest addition, Kaku. Eitto shedin eshechhe. Mittir der ta bhenge jeta uthhechhe, tar opore thake.”….” Salicol ta debo? Gorome chulkuni khub berechhe.”

“Shala, choshma ta dao!”


Scene 2 : ‘Tech’ a look

 

“Tomar jamaibabu aaj amar matha ta chibie khelen. Proshner por proshno!” “Ki hoechhe puchku?” Priyojit er ‘Kutumbo-charit’ jaante chailo Ronita.

“Package jiggesh korlo, tarpor jiggesh korlo ‘Take home’ koto, tarpor kina jiggesh korlo tax er por koto thake. Don’t mind Rony, tomar barir lok bhishon oshobhyo.”

“Khobordar! Tomar baba ki? Ami nighty pori dekhe uni j amar opor ekta heavy duty boshalen, koi, sheta chokhe porlo na tomar?”

“Kii ba korechhe baba tomar sathe?”  “Roj bikele Office theke fire cha korle r beguni bhajle ki tomar figure ta noshto hoe jaabe?” , Ghor Knapiye gelo Babadhon (orofe Priyojit) er konthoshwor.

“Oshob faltu katha chharo, eta bolo to, ei Sharmila ta k?” “Kar katha bolchho?”, jiggesh korlo Priyojit.

“Nyaka, kheyal porchhe na, na? Du ghonta age o tumi er ekta link ‘ share’ korechho. Beshorom!” – Ronita r obhijog shune Priyojit dishehara.

“Tate ki hoechhe? Ota to networking. Amar project tao to networking er opor. Bichhana ta to tomar sathei share korchhi puchku..” – omolin konthe ki ullash Priyojit er!

“Ufff ghemo! Ekhane press na kore jao giye amar shirt ta press kore dao. Ei gorome r para jachhe na. Amake ektu ghumote dao to. Dena Bank er credit card ta die ekta AC to kinte paro!”

Amader Babadhon sottii hard-pressed.


Scene 3 : ‘Amra shob jaani’ samiti

 

“Hulo da, 4 te cha dao to!”

“Dekhte pachho na, bondho korchhi? Raat kota hoechhe dekhechho?” – Hulo, amader mohabidrohi, protibad korlen.

“Naam hulo bole amader k hul dio na. Ekta phone korbo, dokan puro kete shaaf kore debe!” – Samiti r sathe oshomo juddhe naamle bipod onibarjyo.

“O bhai, shedin j 60 takar bhorie nie gele Airtel e, kalker modhye taka ta die dio.”  – Samiti keo poysha dite hoy tahole phone er pichhone!

“Oshob boro payment, tomar dokane boshe debo na. Boro payment nite hole Boro (ugh) office e eshe nite hobe, bujhle kina?” – Sottii eto poysha bole katha.

Etokkhone Hulo da 4-te cha ‘serve’ korechhe. Samitir Sardar ek chumuk dile cha ye. Jaa awaaj holo, tate Shyaambazar er Netaji o knepe uthhlen, tobe jotshamanyo. Sardar bolle onyo der, “Oi gaan ta shunechhish? Hu la la hu la la hu la la?”

“Kon gaan er katha bolchho bolo to?” – keu shob janle bakider ektu kom jantei hobe boi ki.

“Are janish na tora, Dhormotolay shedin oneke eshechhilo, shobar hathe chhilo ek shishi tel.” – Amader Sordar shob jane!

“Tel?”

“Arre haan re, tel. Dakat ra bolechhe, jokhon dorkar porbe tel nie jete hobe nahole pukur udhao hoe jaabe. Dhushh, kichhu janish na tora?”

“jak ge”, Sardar bole chollo, “Tontromontro Diboshe oi okhane gie gaan ta shunlam. Ki ekta bangla chhobir gaan bollo. Ki ekta B-o-n-g….tarpor ta mone porchhe na thhik.”

Thhik tokhon I Traffic signal ta beje uthhlo.

Shunun Shudhijon, Baishakher er prakkale ei oshojhyo gorome eitukuni likhe fellam. Karor maan-abhimaan hole khama kore deben. Nichhok koutuk r hashyorosher opor bhor die dnaarie ache kolom ta. Pochhondo hole bhalo kore hashben, bhalo na lagle ‘shostar chotok’ bole urie deben. Kintu doya kore amar choddopurush udhhar korben na. Ei ‘Poyla Boishakh’-e adhom er namaskar grohon korun.

Awwng – Bong – Chawwng!

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"Poylar PNanchali" by @bongbuzz

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